[lawak] British Humour

A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale has hit Pakistan . Two million Pakistanis have died and over a million are injured. The country is totally ruined and the government doesn't know where to start with providing help to rebuild. The rest of the world is in shock. The USA is sending troops to help. Saudi Arabia is sending oil. Latin American countries are sending supplies. New Zealand is sending sheep, cattle and food crops. The Asian continents are sending labour to assist in rebuilding infrastructure. Australia is sending medical teams and supplies. Britain , not to be outdone, is sending two million replacement Pakistanis back. God Bless British generosity.

[lawak] Logic IQ Thinking

This puzzle is called Lateral Thinking . . .
Just Check This Out ! ! !!


Stroll down slowly and be honest to yourself.


Think like a wizard . . .

man
1. ------------
board

Ans. = man overboard

Okay, let's see if you've got the hang of it.

stand
2. ------------
i

Ans. = I understand

OK . . .

Got the drift ?

Let's try a few now and see

how you fare ?

3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/ g/

Ans. = reading between the lines

4. r
road
a

d

Ans. = cross road

Not having a good day now, are you ?

Redeem yourself.

5. cycle
cycle
cycle

Ans. = tricycle

Not easy to figure out ha!

0
6. ------------
M.D.
Ph.D.

Ans. = two degrees below zero

C'mon give it a little thought ! !

knee
7. ------------
light

Ans.. = neon light

( knee - on - light )

U can prove u r smart by getting this one.

ground
8. ------------ ---
feet feet feet feet feet feet

Ans. = six feet underground

Oh no, not again ! !

9. he's X himself

Ans. = he's by himself

Now u messing up big time.

10. ecnalg

Ans. = backward glance

Not even close ! !

11. death ..... life

Ans. = life after death

Okay last chance ............ ......

12. THINK

Ans. = think big ! !

And the last one is real fundoo - - -

13. ababaaabbbbaaaabbbb ababaabbaaabbbb. ..

Ans. = long time no 'C'

[lawak] Post Office

There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job it was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses. One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God. He thought he should open it to see what it was about. The letter read: Dear God, I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension. Yesterdaysomeone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension check. Next Sunday is Christmas, and I had invited two of my friends over for dinner. Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with. I have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope. Can you please help me? Sincerely, Edna The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers. Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few dollars. By the time he made the rounds, he had collected $96, which they put into an envelope and sent to the woman. The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she would be able to share with her friends. Christmas came and went. A few days later, another letter came from the old lady to God. All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened. It read: Dear God, How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me? Because of your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends. We had a very nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift. By the way, there was $4 missing. I think it must have been those thieving custards at the Post Office.